YOU CALL ME STRONG, YOU CALL ME WEAK, BUT STILL YOUR SECRETS I WILL KEEP
So, my day started out happily enough... went for the requisite walk (listening to my iPod on shuffle for probably the second time ever - I'm into it)... and then Leigh IMed me. Wanting to know if I had seen the news. Ladies and gentlemen, it's the end of an era.
If you're too lazy to clink a link, let me enlighten - SPARKS IS DEAD. Not the band, the beverage. As in the source of at least 80% of mistakes made between 2003-2006. I can't really tell you the last time I drank Sparks. My most recent memory involves Eddie Argos drinking about seven cans at SXSW because he thought it was beer and then nearly dying. But that said, it was very much my jam back in the day. So much so that my 23rd birthday (in 2004) was celebrated at Misshapes with friends and various four-packs (because yes, the creators of Sparks were savvy enough to know that a sixer was lethal).
Ah, the memories....
Brian was kind enough to provide the personal four-pack. There we were (we being Brian, Sarah and myself) posing with the present of all presents. That last pic begat a funny story. At the time, I was very much a blogger. And obviously posted the pics from my birthday on this site. Someone at Rolling Stone was a fan, and when they started putting together their "Hot List" for 2005, Sparks was chosen as the "It" beverage. So an editor reached out and asked if they could run the above photo in the magazine. I said duh! But then they realized that Sarah worked at Spin (at the time) and that they couldn't put her in the competing mag. So Brian went to work with his amazing photoshop skills and.... voila!
No more Sarahface! But no, that wasn't good enough said Rolling Stone. And so, they went with another photo, and our love of Sparks was immortalized as this:
And that piece of work was plastered on every fucking bodega in New York City for like, a year. Yeah, proud times.
Speaking of bodegas, Leigh and I recently discovered a mutual appreciation for really shit supermarkets. Or I guess, I dunno if appreciation is the word. Well, maybe it is.
Me: Dude, have you ever been in that Key Foods on Ave A? I went for the first time recently to get a bottle of water and it was a fucking adventure.
Leigh: I used to go there all the time before Whole Foods opened up. I had to! There were no other grocery stores close by.
Me: OMG, that's true. I didn't think of that. What the hell do people do?
Leigh: Whole Foods kinda saved my life.
Me: Yeah literally, I think someone got stabbed at Key Foods!
Leigh: Even worse was Fine Fair.
Me: What the hell is THAT?
Leigh: That is some ghetto ass shit right there. On Ave C.
Me: Oh I haven't been.
Leigh: Oh you needn't go.
Me: But I love seeing different supermarkets! I kinda love supermarkets.
Leigh: Then by all means, next time you're at Sarah's, stop by.
Me: I actually know which one you mean now.
Leigh: It's the most disgusting place I've ever been to in my life. But when I lived on Pitt street I HAD to go there as well. Have you ever been to Met Foods?
Me: Hmmmm no, but I feel like I've seen it. Where is it?
Leigh: 2nd Ave and 6th.
Me: OMG I thought that shit was abandoned.
Leigh: No way it's fully operational. However I'm not sure why. Or how.
Leigh: They just got credit card machines. Like, last year.
Me: My old favorite was this place called UFM - University Food Market up by Columbia. I wonder if it existed when Max was there. It's not there anymore. It's now Morton Williams and all fancy, but back in the day you literally couldn't buy like, eggs, when you wanted. They would have like, a loaf of bread one week, and then maybe a bagel the next. It was really exciting for stoners.
Leigh: I'm talking to Ryan about Fine Fair now. It smells like the inside of a meat locker in there. And he just informed me that some girl got stabbed at Key Foods last year.
Me: Yes I told you that already spazz. A check out lady. It was some unrequited love shit. I'm surprised the story hasn't turned up in a Law & Order episode yet, actually.
Annnnnnd..... scene. Seriously though, what is it about supermarkets that make them so fascinating? They're total microcosms of life, I guess. Symbolic of their surroundings. I remember being so touched when a boyfriend told me he'd spent the afternoon walking the aisles of my local Food Emporium, imagining what it would be like in the future when he would be on grocery duty for the two of us. And I also remember making the trek up to the massive uptown Fairway with Anna once and telling her that being there made me want to cook for my imaginary husband and three kids. I think I may be officially bonkers.